Learning to Trust the Good Days (Even When You’re Waiting for the Bad)

Introduction

If you’ve lived with anxiety, depression, addiction, or trauma, good days can feel suspicious. When your baseline has been survival, ease feels unfamiliar—maybe even dangerous. The tendency to brace for impact can make it hard to relax, even when things are genuinely going well.

Why We Struggle to Trust the Good

The brain is wired to detect threats—especially if you’ve been through chronic stress or emotional upheaval. When calm finally arrives, your nervous system might not recognize it as safe. Instead, it scans for the next danger.

This reaction isn’t weakness—it’s conditioning. It’s the result of surviving hard seasons by being alert, cautious, and always prepared for things to fall apart.

The Cost of Constant Bracing

When you expect things to go wrong, even subconsciously, you:

• Diminish the joy of the present

• Struggle to rest and recover

• Miss opportunities for connection or growth

• Burn out from always being “on guard”

Eventually, this hypervigilance becomes exhausting. The mind might say, “You’re fine,” but the body stays in defense mode.

What It Looks Like in Daily Life

• You get good news and immediately wonder what will go wrong

• You feel relaxed—and then tense up, thinking it’s “too good to last”

• You downplay progress to avoid disappointment

• You self-sabotage because thriving feels unfamiliar or unsafe

Building the Capacity to Feel Safe in the Good

1. Name What’s Happening

Just labeling the discomfort (“I’m waiting for something bad to happen”) reduces its power. Awareness is step one.

2. Practice Staying With the Moment

When something good happens, pause. Stay with the feeling—even for 30 seconds. What does joy feel like? Calm? Gratitude? Train your body to recognize and tolerate them.

3. Track the Evidence

Keep a “good day journal.” Record small wins, moments of peace, or times things went better than expected. Over time, you’ll teach your brain that safety can last.

4. Talk About It

Let someone you trust know when the fear creeps in. Saying “I’m struggling to enjoy the good” is brave—and it invites grounding and perspective.

Conclusion

Trusting the good days takes time. But they deserve to be lived, not braced against. You’ve survived the hard ones—you’re allowed to exhale when the light finally shines through.